My favorite old store

The Bottle n Bag - Uvalde, Texas
You can buy a twelve pack and a twelve gauge
That fkn kicks ass


Photo from Wikimedia Commons.

Dildo is a town on the island of Newfoundland in the province of Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada. It is located on the southeastern Dildo Arm of Trinity Bay about 100 kilometres northwest of St. John's. South Dildo is a neighbouring unincorporated community. The town's unusual name has brought it a certain amount of notoriety.

That's from Wikipedia, you can see more by clicking THIS



Bicycle Fucks

You know what really pisses me the fuck off? Besides tree-huggers, immigration and something stuck in my sock? Fucking cyclists. I am not talking about fuckers like Lance Armstrong, he did one or both of the Olsen twins, so he can't be all bad and he used to be with Sheryl Crow which makes him super fkn cool. I am talking about the stupid shoe wearing mother-fuckers that ride in gay little packs on county roads in Texas. I can be coming around a corner on a two lane county road listening to my Sirius satellite radio and suddenly come into a flock of spandex wearing ass-lickers hogging the fucking road. Several times I have almost lost control (of my beer)!
Why are these stupid bike-whores riding in the middle of the fucking road with their high arched shoes strapped into their fkn pedals while looking back at me in their little monocle-type mirror strapped to their fkn autistic-style helmet. Get off the fkn road you sonsabitches!!!!
It's bad enough that you ride on the flippin highway occasionally drifting across the line into the lanes, but there are no shoulders on these county roads. So they are just taking up the entire fucking lane!!!!! Even if I had no beer (rare), what the fuck? When I come around a curve doing 60 mph, what the fuck am I supposed to do? Slam on the brakes because you wanna get out and get some miles under your fkn homo wheels? Fuck off! I have no problem with people wanting to get out and be healthy, but don't fuck with my life while doing it. I am on this road for a reason. My taxes and titles and licenses bullshit type crap that I pay to drive on this mother-fuckin road allow me to. I don't see a license plate or inspection sticker on your fkn Schwinn there ass hole, so get the fuck off my road.


Misc. Shit for Your (or rather my) Amusement

A few little things that amused me recently:

This one makes me fucking laugh my ass off

This one I have no explanation for

Kylie Minogue - Bear handjob?

I was behind this dude in traffic, I think he digs camels


I wouldn't drink this

Would you like some tea?

Sounds like something a drunken prom date might end up receiving if she drank a little too much tequilla at an after-party......



Public Shitters

You know the smallish public restrooms like at a cafe or a gas station? There's one toile or possibly a urinal as well (if it's a men's room) plus a sink. These little restrooms are designed for a single individual to utilize alone and have his privacy. These small intimate surroundings are equipped with some type of locking device, possibly a latch or some other type of ingenious invention to keep the door closed whilst you do your business. Why in the fuck is it then that some people don't lock the door behind them? What in your little fucked up mind makes you think that I may possibly want to see whatever the fuck you are doing in there? Even if I walked in and your just simply washing your hands, I don't want to be in that small cell-like area with you while you do it. And fuck me if it hasn't happened before that I try the door, it opens, so I stroll right in and lo and be-fuckin-hold there's some fucker sitting on a toilet! I do not have the desire, the want, or the stomach to observe whatever position you have taken to position yourself on the shitter. Why the fuck can't you lock the door? Does it make your experience better to have a total stranger walk in while your wiping your ass? Mother fucker, I don't want to witness this kind of thing.

Let this be a lesson for you fuckers; Lock the mother fucking door your tasteless, classless, public shitters out there. I have better things to observe in this world.

That's all for now.
Fuck off